June 06, 2011

O

So... My body is alive today, my body is recycling its blood and getting rid of what nots.
And... My mind is dead; I've been drinking water and salt for the past few hours. Is there even a point for me to be in this state of mind?
The sun is out, the rays are shinning outside my window and I... I want to change.
I want to stop drowning
I want to jump high
to fall...
And then cry out loud
To simply stop and say:
I'm done.

So... My hands move freely through your naked body, wondering and rethinking ..
Lies and disruptions.
Touches that implement a type of affection that was never there to begin with.
To explain pain
To let go of selfishness
And bring something else in...
Something bigger and louder than before.
Maybe i'm a masochist, but if it's pain i'll accept it for a little bit.
Until I fall down...
To cry again...
To simply tell myself:
I'm done.

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